Week 8/May 3, 2020

Greetings Shift Into Fifth Community-

Week 8 of some kind of shelter in place for most of us....and I'm continuing to think about YOU.

This week, our 8th week, there is another shift. Some of us are still under strict orders to shelter in place. Some of us are dealing with various forms of "re-opening". And each scenario brings its own set of challenges, opportunities, emotions and more. Understatement....I so get it!

P is for Patience!

Competitive tennis was a big part of my formative years. Starting at the age of 10, I was hooked. Practicing at least 3-4 hours a day and playing tournaments all around was how I spent a huge chunk of my life from 11-22.

At the ripe age of 11, I asked my Mom if I could enter a tournament. A lifelong competitive athlete and lover of all things sports, she was thrilled that I wanted to give it a try. Living in New York, there was no shortage of junior tournaments. We looked and found one 12 and under doubles tournament nearby. I found another 11 year old willing to join me. Little did we know that as first time entrants, we would be matched against the best players (aka top seeds) in round one. This, as it turned out, was true for every tournament I would enter for the next 12 months. I was matched against one of the top 4 players (seeds). Apparently, and unbeknownst to me, this was a rite of passage for all new players. Another opportunity for some character building.

In this case, that top seeded team consisted of the top two 12 and under girls in the United States. My partner and I were too naive to know what was about to hit us. Our opponents looked harmless enough with their braces, pigtails and smock tennis dresses. My grandmother quietly asked that we take it easy on these sweet looking young girls. Ha! 45 minutes later, we were off the court. 6-0, 6-0, these "sweet" girls cleaned our clocks. And as a side note, 4 years later, one of them would become the youngest singles winner of the United States Open at the ripe age of 16 years and 9 months (yes, I'm talking about Tracy Austin:-)

It was quite the introduction to the tennis world. Instead of being defeated, I was hungry for more. Month after month, I entered tournaments, played the top seeds and got wiped off the court. As time went on, my losing matches seemed to take less time. Finally, my Mom asked me why I seemed to be rushing. I explained I knew the outcome, so why would I waste anymore time getting beaten. She paused and looked me straight in the eye and said, "BE PATIENT....there's no rush, we're not going anywhere, win a point, then a game, then a set, then maybe a match...each time, stay out there as long as you can."

The next tournament, before heading onto the court, she took out her eyebrow pencil. She took my left hand and put a big P on it. I was perplexed. She looked me straight in the eye and said, "P is for Patience. Look down and remember that. Take your time. Stay out there. We're in no rush. Win a point. Win a game. Win a set. Then maybe even a match" She would do that for every tournament until I left to play collegiate tennis. Wise words. A metaphor for life. A lesson I would never forget.

Fast forward. This week, at each turn, I was reminded of those wise words. Be Patient! Week 8 of Sheltering in Place far away from my home. Away from my children. When would I leave Arizona? How would I get back to Boston after getting my stepmom settled in New York? When will I see my children? How will that work? What will re-entry to New York and/or Boston be like? Questions. Lots of questions. And, not a lot of concrete answers.

The discomfort of the unknown/uncertainty was almost excruciating at points throughout the week. Looking through emails, I saw one from one of my favorite fellow/sister coaches (and friend) Leigh Weinraub. Her coaching and apparel company, Mind In Motion (https://getyourmindinmotion.com), has an awesome array of clothing and products with words of inspiration. Part of her mission is to empower and change the world one word at a time. I often go to that website to get inspired. A "go to" reenergizing resource for me.

And bam...I remembered that P on my hand from so many years ago. BE PATIENT....breathe, pause, take it one step at a time...let things unfold and trust that the answers will come (point, game, set, match). Shift, pivot, be present, focus and put in the work to move forward on the things that I can...that are here and now...gather facts/information, network with those who might have insights/information, continue to do my coaching work, meditate, write, run...and accept "reality", aka make peace with those things that are uncertain for now.

Patience. I know. It's not easy. It's a practice that warrants cultivation. A muscle that must be strengthened and tended to. Remember, change is the one constant. Pandemic or not. Every second, we are changing. It's the one thing that is a sure bet. How we handle change is at the core of how we move through life. My coaching practice is dedicated to supporting and accelerating positive and purposeful change. While there is no one size fits all on HOW to change, or what change will ultimately look like, there are definitely some tried and true tools that help each of us effectuate and move through change positively, productively and position us for sustainable and rewarding success. And PATIENCE is one of those key tools.

Developing and sustaining the muscles that support positive and productive action and energy is the work that we continue to do together in the Shift Into Fifth community. Remember, so many of you have started and continue to do the hard work to cultivate and develop the inner tools to stay calm, centered and shift/utilize energy in productive and powerful ways. In other words, you are ready to meet the moment!!!

Please, stay extra vigilant about your own self-care - hydration, nutrition, sleep, exercise/movement, meditation/mindfulness/deep breathing, practicing self-compassion/kindness/gratitude, laughing/smiling, staying super curious (each day asking who are my teachers today/noting lessons learned-today's takeaways), limiting social media/tv/print exposure, actively choosing/ingesting those thoughts/stories/information that support your optimal self etc. Remember, this is a marathon...not a sprint!

Accessing resources is key! Please remember that I have put all the weekly SIF Community Coronavirus/Covid-19 Care Correspondence on my blog (www.shiftintofifth.com) with an additional (growing) list of resources for all of you to use and to share with others. Thanks to many of you, our SIF Community is growing and so is the list of resources-thank YOU!

This week's highlight Covid-19 inspired resource is from Wisdom 2.0 and Jon Kabat-Zinn:

http://wisdom2conference.com/live

This link connects you to Wisdom 2.0's hosted daily Conversation and Meditation with Jon Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D. (Monday through Friday starting at 2 pm EDT/11 am PDT). Wisdom 2.0 creates workshops, conferences, talks and meet-ups to address the great challenges and opportunities at the intersection of technology, business and mindfulness/meditation to engage in ways that are beneficial to our own well-being, effectiveness in our work and useful to the world. Jon Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D, Professor Emeritus of Medicine at the University of Massachusetts, and founder of MBSR (Mindfulness Stress Reduction), is a scientist, writer and meditation teacher widely credited for bringing mindfulness into the mainstream of medicine and society.

And I want to remind you that I am here for YOU-to support you in any way that I can. If that means a quick call for you to rant/vent or simply to get a pep talk for you and/or members of your circles, I am here. Creating more anabolic energy for accelerated positive and purposeful change in the world is at the very core of my mission. Supporting YOU is key to that mission.

Stay strong. Be Safe. Stay Healthy. Be kind.

With Gratitude and Purpose,

Valerie

PS. In my work and life, humor is an essential tool for shifting and staying in positive/anabolic energy. Thus, I'm sharing a few new pandemic inspired cartoons/memes. I'm also attaching 2 new podcast episodes that I found particularly inspiring and illuminating (exploring such essential themes as adaptability, kindness, joy, anxiety, laughter, self-compassion, loneliness, grief, responding vs. reacting, connectivity, patience, choice, resilience, gratitude and hope). Please take a moment to listen-you'll be glad you did.

PPS. And I want to share more of the desert spring magic. This time, I'm including some of the wildlife out here (yup...bobcats, mule deer, jabalinas, oh my!:-) Each day brings a new array of colors and shapes. The power, grandeur and majesty of it all still takes my breath away. It reminds me to stay humble, hopeful and so grateful. And keeps me rooted in the power of possibilities. Enjoy!

1. Listen to David Kessler and Brené on Grief and Finding Meaning from Unlocking Us with Brené Brown on Apple Podcasts. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/unlocking-us-with-bren%C3%A9-brown/id1494350511?i=1000470046138

2. Listen to Brené on Anxiety, Calm + Over/Under-Functioning from Unlocking Us with Brené Brown on Apple Podcasts. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/unlocking-us-with-bren%C3%A9-brown/id1494350511?i=1000470370881